Make Decisions for Yourself, Not Based on the Opinions of Others

If you are someone who believes birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays truly matter, I’m here to tell you something important: it is perfectly okay to feel that way.

Too often, people downplay special moments. They judge others for celebrating “too much,” caring “too deeply,” or putting effort into things they don’t personally value. But the truth is simple — none of us know when our last special day with our loved ones will be.

That alone makes every celebration worth honoring.

Every Moment Is Worth Celebrating

We only get so many Christmases.
So many birthdays.
So many anniversaries.

And whether it’s a “big” milestone or not, every single one is special.

Life moves fast. We get busy. We assume there will always be another year, another holiday, another opportunity to gather everyone together. But that assumption isn’t always true.

In a moment, everything can change.
Illness. Loss. Heartbreak. Tragedy.

When you really think about it, there is no such thing as an “ordinary” celebration — because time itself is not ordinary.

So take the photos.
Throw the party.
Buy the gift.
Decorate until your heart is content.

Life is too short not to.

Learning to Honor Your Own Feelings

This hasn’t always been easy for me.

I’ve spent years struggling with my desire to make everything special while trying to respect that not everyone sees life the way I do. Some people are stuck in survival mode. Some are exhausted by the day-to-day grind. Some don’t have the emotional or mental space to celebrate.

Understanding that helped me develop empathy — but it also forced me to confront something important.

Their perspective does not invalidate mine.

Just because others don’t feel the same about celebrations, traditions, or life in general does not mean I need to shrink my joy to fit their comfort.

Stop Letting Loud Opinions Drown Out Your Own

Too often, we allow the opinions of others — especially the loudest ones — to dictate:

• What matters

• When we celebrate

• How much effort is “acceptable”

• Whether something is worth doing at all

And that isn’t fair.

Life isn’t always fair — and that’s okay — but this is one area where you do have control. If you are allowing someone else’s opinion to silence your happiness, that is a choice, not something happening to you.

And choices can be changed.

Responsibility vs. Circumstance

There’s an important distinction to make here.

When life throws something at you that you cannot control, you adjust. You evaluate. You pivot. You grow.

But when you do have the power to change your situation and choose not to — then you are participating in the problem.

Don’t complain about a life you’re unwilling to actively shape.

Make conscious decisions.
Put yourself first.
Don’t hide your sparkle.

Go all out if it brings you joy — or skip the event entirely if it doesn’t. Both are valid when the choice is truly yours.

Learning When to Say Yes — and When to Say No

Personal growth taught me two powerful lessons that seem contradictory but aren’t.

Say Yes to Expansion

There are seasons in life where growth requires saying yes:

• Trying new things

• Meeting new people

• Stepping outside your comfort zone

Say No Without Guilt

At the same time, I learned something equally important:
If an invitation isn’t a “hell yes”, then it’s a no.

Both can coexist — and learning to balance them is a journey.

You Cannot Please Everyone — and That’s Okay

This realization was one of the hardest for me.

I’ve spent much of my life trying to coordinate my choices around other people’s expectations — professionally, personally, and emotionally. But after a lot of self-reflection, I learned that pleasing yourself matters too.

Yes, I lost relationships along the way.
Friends.
Family.
Romantic partners.

And while that was painful, the truth is this:
If putting yourself first causes someone to leave, they were never meant to receive everything you had to give.

Constant takers drain your energy.
And once they’re gone, you finally have the space to flourish.

Live Authentically — Even If It Scares You

So here’s the point of all this:

Put yourself first.
See the world through your own eyes, not through the opinions of others.
Celebrate anything that matters to you.

Decorate just because it makes you happy.
Overbuy gifts if that’s your love language.
Lean into the parts of yourself that feel “too much.”

Living authentically may cost you some people — but it will give you your life back.

And one day, you’ll look back and thank yourself for making conscious decisions that honored who you truly are.